I Made a TikTok!

Yeah. I made a tiktok. I have joined.

I was told there were funny dog videos. I discovered an entire community of bookish nerds and writers. It took two months to work up the nerve to make my own videos, but I have. As of the writing of this post, I have made and posted two.

I get this tingly nervous feeling every time I post something online. Not here, because not a lot of people read this blog, but on a platform like Tiktok or Twitter? I get nervous at the amount of people that might see my content. Just the idea of how many people could see them makes me panic. That doesn’t mean a lot of people see my content – my first tiktok has gotten about 550 views. That makes me nervous. That many people are judging my content, judging me, judging my writing – all quickly an unconsciously.

I’m not a poster child. I don’t have the personality to be in front of people. I don’t have the charisma to draw people in, to convince them with a smile and a buttery voice to buy my books or the books I recommend. I am not that person. Never had been. Never will be.

I’ve made peace with that. I’m emotionally cold, introverted, and have serious RBF.

Writing communities have been a haven for me. I live in a hick town where the majority of people don’t read. Those that do don’t read fantasy. It’s weird for me to be 30 and unmarried and childless. Places like tiktok and twitter have opened doors for a wider community of people just like me, introverts who likes books more than people. It makes me not feel so alone and isolated in this corner of the Midwest.

On tiktok? Come find me! @Beatrice_Author

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